May 2013
10 posts
Nothing like the smell of overheating garbage in Chinatown to let you know that summer has finally come to New York City.
Mother's Day 2013
Nico decided to celebrate Mother’s Day by waking up at 5 am. Oh, joy.
(No, but really-“oh, joy”. Maybe not every second of every day, but overall I’m finding the joy/minute ratio in this while parenting thing is higher than in anything I’ve ever done. Just…not at 5 am.)
If I never see another apartment or job application for the rest of my life, it’ll be too soon.
Holy paperwork, batman!
I wonder if I’ll ever be grown up enough to have an organized Tupperware cabinet.
Parenting a toddler boy means pointing out sirens and street sweepers with more enthusiasm than you ever thought possible.
“There are eight million naked cities in this naked city — they dispute and...”
– “The Colossus of New York,” Colson Whitehead
my own personal skyline. (via emilyinternet)
One of my favorite books of all time. If you live (or have ever lived) in New York City and you haven’t read this, you’re doing yourself a great disservice.
April 2013
10 posts
Big fan of the Jewel pandora station this morning. So far they’ve played “who will save your soul” “strong enough” and “ironic” and the 9the grade flashbacks are coming fast and furious.
Some days New York is this glamorous place full of endless excitement and adventure.
And some days it’s the place that leaves you crawling around the apartment for an hour on your hands and knees, trying to discover where the horrifying smell of death is coming from, until your husband finally unscrews the bottom of your fancy garbage can and discovers a decomposing mouse that somehow got...
Apartment dwelling mamas:
What are your thoughts on leaving your sleeping child alone in the apartment and running downstairs to get the laundry from the dryer (assuming you have laundry in your building)?
I always thought it was a big no-no, but today the laundry room was about to close and Nico was still sleeping so I did it, and now I’m sort of like, some people have houses as big as our apartment building and...
New raincoat = checking the forecast and actually feeling sad there’s no more rain in the future.
It’s stoop sitting weather-yay!
I don’t have a stoop-boo.
Note to self and anyone who may EVER be flying...
If, the night before flying across the country with your toddler by yourself for the umpteenth time, said toddler should find themselves unhappily awake between the hours of 2 and 6 am, I STRONGLY urge you to consider chalking up the trip altogether.
The resulting aftermath if you don’t (5 hours trapped on a plane with a screaming 19 month old) will result in serious tears on both your parts,...
March 2013
22 posts
Things I am sick of:
•using winter lotion
•wearing my puffy coat
•staticky hair
Things I am ready for (but, in all fairness, may end up complaining about at some point as well):
•sweat between my boobs
•nights that are too hot to sleep
•having black feet because of non-stop flip flop wearing (sorry if you think that’s gross-I am a diehard flip flop wearer)
So, is this winter just never going to end then?
Awesome.
(Not)
Listen, I know I am supposed to “enjoy every moment” of this whole parenting journey, but it is getting REALLY hard to enjoy this recent string of 4:30 a.m. starts to our day that we’ve been having lately.
Is 6 a.m. so much to ask for???
North Dakota Approves Bill to Ban Abortions as... →
Well, you add North Dakota to the list of states I’ll never be living in.
7 am and I’ve already cleaned up more puke than seems possible to come out of a little body. Happy Saturday, y’all.
(Send help)
Well, that's reassuring
Just sat in on a 9th grade advisory class where the topic was boundaries and personal space.
The teacher asked the question, “does no ever NOT mean no?”
The answer, according to the overwhelming majority of students was “no doesn’t mean no if it’s your girlfriend or boyfriend.”
I mean…I’m sort of at a loss for words on this one. Except-wow....
Every single night after getting out of the bath, Nico yells “pee!”, runs down the hall as fast as he can, and proceeds to pee on the floor in as many spots as he can before we catch him.
I know I shouldn’t laugh, but I can’t help it-that shit is hilarious.
(Also-thank god for hardwood floors. There would be nothing even remotely funny about it if we had carpets.)
Nico decided to celebrate turning 18 months by having a party in his crib from 3:45-5:45 this morning.
And by party, I mean hysterical crying fit that couldn’t be stopped no matter what I did.
I’d forgotten what it feels like to be operating on 4 hours of sleep-how did I ever survive months of this??
18 months (?!?!)
and just like that, this little guy is 18 months old. which means he’s a year and a half. which means he’s practically two. which means he’s basically grown and doesn’t need me anymore. sob, sob.
i have always found it SO annoying when people talk about how “it goes by so fast” or “you blink and you miss it”. because, you know what? the days are...
Silver Linings Playbook
Thanks to an unexpected day off from work (and the fact that we pay our nanny whether she works or not), I got to go out to lunch and to the movies all by myself, and it was freaking awesome.
I know I’m a little late to the “Silver Linings Playbook” party, but I don’t get out much. Here are my 2 main thoughts:
•I, like the rest of the Internet, think Jennifer Lawrence...
I’ve taken a 2 hour nap every day for the past three days. It’s going to be really hard to go back to reality tomorrow.
Rincon, Puerto Rico in Bullet Points and Pictures
(because i’m too lazy to form actual paragraphs)
This kid has NO fear of the ocean. To a frightening degree. Rincon is known as the surfing capital of the Caribbean, and has some pretty intense waves to go along with that. Even when he was literally getting smacked in the face by a wave, he was just about the happiest I’ve ever seen him.
If you go to Rincon, do NOT miss Banana...
I am so totally over any day whose temperature begins with the number 2 or 3. Spring weather only from here on out, pleeeeease!
I would totally be ready to have another kid, as long as I could just start at 6 months. It’s the whole newborn phase that’s really holding me back.
To the lady who attempted to physically pick up my son and put him in the stroller while we were walking down the street saying, “don’t you think he should ride in the stroller? I think it would be better if he was in the stroller,”-
BACK THE FUCK UP. If I wanted him to be in the stroller, he would be in the goddamn stroller.
February 2013
16 posts
1 tag
Would you think it strange if I said that I’d consider myself a success as a parent if I can be half the mom that Tami Taylor is?
Hi, my name is Sage and I'm a Netflix binge...
In the 18 months (!!!) since Nico was born, I have watched about a billion TV shows in their entirety thanks to the wonder that is Netflix instant.
The combination of my decreased attention span (seriously, I can rarely sit through an entire movie anymore), limited free time (who knows how long nap time will be from one day to the next?) and the fact that the iPad makes watching TV while...
I’m about 99% sure that one of the students at this school is the son of a pretty major celebrity. As in, just won an Oscar-level celebrity. This morning, the other kids were asking him how LA was, and a quick google search revealed that said celebrity does in fact have a son with the same first name (and I already know his last name).
It would be really, really wrong to start kissing up to a...
So, three days a week I work at a high school (I could write an essay about the hell that is New York City public high schools, but that’s a post for another day) in Chelsea, and I swear, if one more teacher asks me what class I’m supposed to be in, or one more security guard asks to see my hall pass, I’m gonna lose it. I’m 30 fucking years old! I mean, I know I look young,...
Just in time for our trip to Puerto Rico on Tuesday, Nico has decided he
a) no longer sleeps through the night
and
b) thinks 4:45 is a perfectly acceptable wake up time.
So, that’s pretty awesome. Relaxing vacation, here we come!
Two tickets to see closing night of Beyonce’s tour at Barclay’s arena in August-done and done.
This gloomy Monday just got waaaay better.
